My husband has taken a mistress.
It's time to come clean. She's been in our lives now for a little over a year. In fact, most of you know about her. It may surprise some of you that I am reacting so calmly and haven't gone full Latina. (A fate to which he has been warned) At this point, however, I feel it is more beneficial to the three of us if I not only accept her but embrace her very existence.
Put down your pitchforks.
Her name is "Father's Creed." Matt's book.
Yes, the Sully family has a new member. For now anyway. She visits him most days at work. She is waiting for all of us every night when we get home. And I'm pretty sure she's along for most of our outings. Matt knows her intricately. And I am happily, finally, getting some one-on-one time with her too.
I don't write this to grumble. I'm over-the-moon proud of "Father's Creed." And I'm very much enjoying Matt's excitement at each milestone. This was no easy feat. He's been writing thousands of words a day. And when he's not writing, he's researching - everything from geography and nautical terms to bonnet colors and the German language. It's exhausting.
I feel, now, it is my responsibility to share what this experience has been like. Somewhere there is a person who's spouse is about to start this same journey. Mine is not a unique tale. It's not even a cautionary one. I just want to give a general heads up to the future wives (or husbands) of a first-time-novelist.
Here's what I've found:
1. You're going to talk a lot about people that don't actually exist. Even though Matt created Nathaniel, Amity and Charlotte, I am now also (surprisingly) completely invested.
2. They will be preoccupied. A lot. Those wheels never quit turning. There have been many long stares over dinner and sleepless nights.
3. Be prepared to hate it. I'm one of the lucky ones. "Father's Creed" is quite good and I can't wait to read more. But, I fear, for some this isn't always the case. Tread carefully with feedback. Remember this is their baby.
5. Although hard sometimes, when they are "in the zone", back off. Don't interrupt the creative flow. I'm dealing with a textbook resolute Scorpio. I've known this for years. In full concentration mode, Matt is to be left alone. If you violate this, you will endure his wrath.
And last...
6. Honour the timeline. Last year, Matt told me his goal was to complete the first draft by his 40th birthday. Honestly, that seemed a little nuts to me at first. He totally did it. He impressively stuck to the timeline he had laid out for himself. Now, we're in Phase II of his timeline - a second draft by mid-February.
Just know you are part of the process too. There are days when doubt creeps in. There are days of frustration when he can't figure out how to make something work. But there are also days of elation when I can tell he knows it's good - when he let's himself celebrate. This is always hard for him in any endeavor. Luckily, he has me, the eternal optimist, to help keep him focused on the good. To encourage. To cheer.
"Father's Creed" is coming, folks. I'm looking forward to you all meeting the other woman. She's pretty great. And I know Matt will love getting feedback from an unbiased audience. Maybe somewhere deep down he thinks my praise is just being a good wife.
It's not.
Vanessa Sully
It's time to come clean. She's been in our lives now for a little over a year. In fact, most of you know about her. It may surprise some of you that I am reacting so calmly and haven't gone full Latina. (A fate to which he has been warned) At this point, however, I feel it is more beneficial to the three of us if I not only accept her but embrace her very existence.
Put down your pitchforks.
Her name is "Father's Creed." Matt's book.
Yes, the Sully family has a new member. For now anyway. She visits him most days at work. She is waiting for all of us every night when we get home. And I'm pretty sure she's along for most of our outings. Matt knows her intricately. And I am happily, finally, getting some one-on-one time with her too.
I don't write this to grumble. I'm over-the-moon proud of "Father's Creed." And I'm very much enjoying Matt's excitement at each milestone. This was no easy feat. He's been writing thousands of words a day. And when he's not writing, he's researching - everything from geography and nautical terms to bonnet colors and the German language. It's exhausting.
I feel, now, it is my responsibility to share what this experience has been like. Somewhere there is a person who's spouse is about to start this same journey. Mine is not a unique tale. It's not even a cautionary one. I just want to give a general heads up to the future wives (or husbands) of a first-time-novelist.
Here's what I've found:
1. You're going to talk a lot about people that don't actually exist. Even though Matt created Nathaniel, Amity and Charlotte, I am now also (surprisingly) completely invested.
2. They will be preoccupied. A lot. Those wheels never quit turning. There have been many long stares over dinner and sleepless nights.
3. Be prepared to hate it. I'm one of the lucky ones. "Father's Creed" is quite good and I can't wait to read more. But, I fear, for some this isn't always the case. Tread carefully with feedback. Remember this is their baby.
5. Although hard sometimes, when they are "in the zone", back off. Don't interrupt the creative flow. I'm dealing with a textbook resolute Scorpio. I've known this for years. In full concentration mode, Matt is to be left alone. If you violate this, you will endure his wrath.
And last...
6. Honour the timeline. Last year, Matt told me his goal was to complete the first draft by his 40th birthday. Honestly, that seemed a little nuts to me at first. He totally did it. He impressively stuck to the timeline he had laid out for himself. Now, we're in Phase II of his timeline - a second draft by mid-February.
Just know you are part of the process too. There are days when doubt creeps in. There are days of frustration when he can't figure out how to make something work. But there are also days of elation when I can tell he knows it's good - when he let's himself celebrate. This is always hard for him in any endeavor. Luckily, he has me, the eternal optimist, to help keep him focused on the good. To encourage. To cheer.
"Father's Creed" is coming, folks. I'm looking forward to you all meeting the other woman. She's pretty great. And I know Matt will love getting feedback from an unbiased audience. Maybe somewhere deep down he thinks my praise is just being a good wife.
It's not.
Vanessa Sully
The world is waiting with breath that is bated. |
You're the best, and you'll always be my number one gal. Thank you for the constant support.
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