A few nights ago Matt and I were watching an old episode of Sex and the City. Well, I was watching. He was half-listening and playing on his phone.
"Ugh. I hate these scenes when they're talking."
First, don't you dare dis my show. Second, "What do you mean?!"
"It's so forced. Life. Love. Clever quip. We're so funny!" He said mockingly.
Taken aback for a second, I looked at him utterly confused, "That's how girlfriends talk. We're much more clever than men."
Cue eye roll. He knows I'm right. Still, I couldn't help but wonder, (see what I did there?) What the hell do men talk about?
I thought back to a few recent conversations we've had after a "Guys Night." There have been some major developments among our group of friends in the last few months: 3 big moves, a hospital stay for a sick kid, new jobs and general adulting. Lots of material for in-depth discussions.The day-after exchange goes something like this;
Me, "So how's *sick kid's name*?"
Matt, Shrug.
Me, "Is *friend* feeling any better?"
Matt, "I guess."
Me, "Are they enjoying their new house?"
Matt, "Shit, I don't know."
Is he oblivious or distracted? Uninterested or heartless?
Man or woman?
I don't get it. What do you guys say? Do you sit in utter silence? Are your conversations nothing more than guttural sounds and bodily functions? Do you speak in code? Please enlighten me. How do you know if you have things in common? How do you feel about things? What are you afraid of? What are your dreams? ...and there I go being a woman again.
So I guess I'll never understand. I find vagaries infuriating. It seems to me men are more easily able to lose themselves in the mundane; to live in the moment. Women (well, this woman anyway) are usually a few steps ahead of what's going on around them. For better or worse. And if you have a little bit of anxiety (*raises hand*) then it's usually a few more steps ahead of that. Our minds are always on. Our worry-meters turned to 11.
Matt will ask, "What are you so worried about?"
"Oh, just everything,"
"Well, stop it."
If only...
In that regard I envy men! Put on a game, give them a beer or hand them a ball and they can effortlessly go into out-of-service mode. It must be nice to have these mini vacations. To take a break from yourself. Many times, I've asked to tag-a-long to get an inside look on how this is done. The answer is always a staunch, "NO." Fine. Go be guys. Go enjoy your wife-free night. Go enjoy your conversations about nothing.
...and pay no attention to that familiar face at the end of the bar wearing the fake mustache and overcoat. "He's" definitely not paying too much attention to your conversation. (or lack thereof)
"Ugh. I hate these scenes when they're talking."
First, don't you dare dis my show. Second, "What do you mean?!"
"It's so forced. Life. Love. Clever quip. We're so funny!" He said mockingly.
Taken aback for a second, I looked at him utterly confused, "That's how girlfriends talk. We're much more clever than men."
Cue eye roll. He knows I'm right. Still, I couldn't help but wonder, (see what I did there?) What the hell do men talk about?
I thought back to a few recent conversations we've had after a "Guys Night." There have been some major developments among our group of friends in the last few months: 3 big moves, a hospital stay for a sick kid, new jobs and general adulting. Lots of material for in-depth discussions.The day-after exchange goes something like this;
Me, "So how's *sick kid's name*?"
Matt, Shrug.
Me, "Is *friend* feeling any better?"
Matt, "I guess."
Me, "Are they enjoying their new house?"
Matt, "Shit, I don't know."
Is he oblivious or distracted? Uninterested or heartless?
Man or woman?
I don't get it. What do you guys say? Do you sit in utter silence? Are your conversations nothing more than guttural sounds and bodily functions? Do you speak in code? Please enlighten me. How do you know if you have things in common? How do you feel about things? What are you afraid of? What are your dreams? ...and there I go being a woman again.
So I guess I'll never understand. I find vagaries infuriating. It seems to me men are more easily able to lose themselves in the mundane; to live in the moment. Women (well, this woman anyway) are usually a few steps ahead of what's going on around them. For better or worse. And if you have a little bit of anxiety (*raises hand*) then it's usually a few more steps ahead of that. Our minds are always on. Our worry-meters turned to 11.
Matt will ask, "What are you so worried about?"
"Oh, just everything,"
"Well, stop it."
If only...
In that regard I envy men! Put on a game, give them a beer or hand them a ball and they can effortlessly go into out-of-service mode. It must be nice to have these mini vacations. To take a break from yourself. Many times, I've asked to tag-a-long to get an inside look on how this is done. The answer is always a staunch, "NO." Fine. Go be guys. Go enjoy your wife-free night. Go enjoy your conversations about nothing.
...and pay no attention to that familiar face at the end of the bar wearing the fake mustache and overcoat. "He's" definitely not paying too much attention to your conversation. (or lack thereof)
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| Wasn't me. |
A she spy!
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