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Extra Cheese: A Tale of Heartbreak


I’ve become the very thing I used to mock. If 5-years-ago-me  heard some of the things coming out of Today-me’s mouth regularly, I’d scoff, “Suck it up!” and take another bite of my extra-cheese pizza and gulp a drink of beer. But, oh how times have changed. I’ve been reduced to 3 questions:

“Do you have gluten-free options?”

“Can I get lactose-free milk?”

“Is it possible to leave off the sesame seeds?”

A little background: I’ve basically been in some sort of pain for about the last year or so. I got used to taking daily Ibuprofen’s, sometimes Naproxen. Some days Ibuprofen and Aspirin. And still some days both with a heating pad. That’s just how it was going to be now. I’m in my 40’s and (according to one useless Doctor’s analysis and dismissal) and I should just learn to cope as I begin my decade-long slide into menopause. Yeah, thanks.

My discomfort sent me to the emergency room 3 times. Blood work showed nothing and I was beginning to lose hope. Then, after much research, and a Dr. who FINALLY listened to me, we found one piece of the puzzle: Uncomplicated Diverticulitis. That’s what that pain is. Of course! I was given meds and it subsided…

…for awhile.

As if realizing that I was finally feeling kinda normal, my body seemed to rebel in a big way. I was either being stabbed by some invisible force or a Xenomorph was about to burst free from my gut. The level of pain accounted for either… or both. Sadly, (or maybe luckily) I know what Diverticulitis pain feels like and this wasn’t it. So, back to the Dr. I went.

Long story short: More blood work. More tests. An ultrasound. Lots of tears. I was told one of the saddest things of my life, “You have a gluten and dairy intolerance.” But bread!! But cheese!! But bread dipped in cheese!!

Sadness.

I hate this term….but it was a true “Aha moment.” I remembered how my tummy grumbled every time Matt and I would go for beers. I remembered how I would wake up every morning with an upset stomach after my nightly glass of milk. And too many other duh’s to name. Ok, this makes sense. I made an oath right then and there, in the office, to change my diet and test this theory.

It’s now 3 weeks later.

The verdict: I’ve lost 10 pounds. My skin has cleared up. I feel less anxious and most importantly, I don’t hurt. Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhttttttttttt…..this is what it feels like to not feel … anything. I forgot.

So, here we are. I’m that person. I spend my free time researching gut-friendly recipes and adjusting to my new normal.

I’m telling this (TMI) story for one simple reason: these diagnoses were made by me. I took these theories to my doctors and asked to be tested. I did this several times. I made noise until someone listened. Far too often, we are dismissed. We are given a generic analysis and some “this’ll help for now” medication. It’s absurd.

Simply put: If not for my self-advocating, I’d still feel like shit.

I don’t know if this is the complete solution to my gastro problems but, it’s a big damn start and I know now I’m headed in the right direction. I have hope of being pain-free.

Please friends, if there’s something happening with you. Something that’s just not right. (Who knows better than you?) I urge you (beg you!) to not take “no” for an answer. Demand tests. Demand answers. Demand a doctor who will listen. It’s totally acceptable to be an a-hole nuisance when it comes to your health. And a good doctor won’t mind.

Here’s to a happy, healthy 2020.

XOXO
-Vanessa  Sully

Good advice.


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